leeks

It was like Dr. Seuss characters invaded our home this week and stood in place for the kids during our mystery food challenge. Even sautéing the leeks in a little butter and olive oil didn’t help our cause. Leeks were not a hit food. They’ll get there. Leeks cooking in butter is one of the all time best cooking smells. One day they’ll realize the error of their ways…

ME: Ok.  Smell it.

LAUREN: Oh my God.

ME: Why?  Why oh my God?  What does it smell like?

LAUREN: Wine.

ME: Wine?

LAUREN: It smells like wine.

ME: Does it smell like wine?  There’s no wine in there.  You think I’d feed you wine? What do you think it smells like Sam?

SAM: A strong smell. It has a strong smell of wine.

ME: Ok.  It’s not wine.

LAUREN: And beer.

ME: No, that’s my beer that you’re smelling!  

EMMA: Yummy!

ME: Yeah, yummy, right?  Smells good.

LAUREN: Actually, it’s not.

SAM: It smells like a trash can.

ME: Ok. It’s not a trash can.

[kids laughing]

ME: What are these called, because you guessed last week.

EMMA: Collard greens.

ME: Nope, it’s not that.  What vegetable rhymes with weeks?

LAUREN: Cheeks.

EMMA: Sausage.

SAM: Keeks.

ME: Nope.

LAUREN: Leeks.

EMMA:  Sausage.

LAUREN: Leeks.

EMMA: Yeah.

LAUREN: Leeks.

ME: Ok. Sausage?

SAM: Cheeks.

EMMA: Yeah, sausage.

LAUREN: Leeks.

SAM: Queeks.

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Let’s start with the tough news first. This winter we had not one, not two, not three…no, that would be seven pipes break at our lake house because of polar vortices #1 and #2. This was going to be the year to get the kids on skis for a whole season; the gear had been rented, the helmets sized. The repairs took 3 months and before we knew it, the ski hills of Northern New Jersey (they exist) were no longer open.

But the good news is that we’re back in action and were up at the lake house this weekend getting the place ready for Spring.

Which is tough when you have a hangover. This seems to be happening all too frequently, which I blame on the renovations, too much time in New York, and too many friends with early birthdays.

party

I go into these kinds of evenings with a strategy – stay calm, eat lots of food, drink a glass of wine, two max. Then someone orders a round of shots and the jig is up. The volume increases, the Champagne flows, and all of a sudden I’m waist-deep in a story about body waxing. Filter it! That’s at least the new plan since my inbound strategy never seems to work.

Jack always feels my pain. He’s like my hangover soul mate. The kind of supernatural being who understands my anguish and empathizes by mirroring my body language.

jack

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IMG_5608 - Version 2

I once told a horrible tale about suffering through month after month of vegetarian lasagna.

This is not entirely accurate.

Yes, it was the summer when I was pregnant and deluged with weekly deliveries of vegetable-filled CSA boxes. It was exhausting, but it was also thrilling – each week opening a box to something new, something fresh, plucked from the ground only a day or two before.

I don’t know how much vegetarian lasagna I made that summer but it was enough to put a spare freezer on my Amazon Wishlist. Never mind the lack of space in my apartment. Details…Throw an afghan over it and there you go, instant coffee table.

What I really should have done is gotten a food manufacturing license and started to sell them at the local Walmart. They would have flown out the door, especially given the competing options which are full of cultured Dextrose and other unmentionables.

My technique is simple – I make a quick tomato sauce – in a pinch you can use a good jarred version. But it takes three minutes to sautee an onion & carrot, add a can or two of tomato puree, season, and let it simmer while you tend to the rest.

With the sauce simmering, I cook (most often grill on my indoor grill pan) the vegetables and prepare the remaining ingredients.

Although I’ve made lasagna with fresh pasta before, it can be time consuming, and you can get great results with no boil noodles. When you’re using no boil, or oven ready noodles, you definitely need a filling that has some heft – this isn’t the time for an airy cream sauce. I cut my vegetables into thick slices, drizzle some olive oil, season, and grill then until they’re nice and charred. No indoor grill pan? Slice them the same way, and roast them in the oven instead. They’ll still pack plenty of flavor.

When the vegetables are done, all I have left to do is to mix an egg into the ricotta, and I’m ready to assemble.

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The layering is pretty simple. Here’s my rule – don’t sweat it. Even after layering countless lasagnas, I still lose track of what goes where. It’s hard to remember the order – was it noodle, sauce, ricotta, veg? Or noodle, sauce, veg, ricotta? Don’t panic! This is not life or death. As long as you have some sauce on the bottom, and leave enough sauce for the top, it will be….just….fine….

I only say this because I was once that person – the lasagna novice who was overly concerned about having the layers in the right order; I would dart back and forth from the recipe, reading the instructions once, twice, thrice. Child’s play! Now you know my secret – that with homemade tomato sauce, fresh ricotta, and grilled vegetables, you really can’t go wrong. Just do me a favor- season it well- those plain noodles need to be salted and if you’re just seasoning the fillings, the noodles will be bland.

IMG_5612 - Version 2

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Collard greens

I have a confession: I’ve never cooked collard greens at home. I’ve eaten them plenty of times, but for some reason, whenever I’ve got greens in mind I go for kale or chard. Collards have to be cooked a little longer than other greens to soften them, but otherwise, they are delicious eaten with a touch of olive oil and salt. A splash of vinegar works too, but since we’re being purists in our challenge I try to keep the flavors as close to their natural state as possible.

Verdict on collard greens? Our conversation was long and confusing and I still don’t have an answer. Apologies.

ME: Ok.  Mystery food right now is….

EMMA: I want purple.

ME: Who can tell me what this is?

LAUREN: Greens, greens, greens.

ME: Yeah.  It’s greens.  What kind of greens.

LAUREN: Uh salad greens?

ME: Uh Nope.  It’s not salad greens.  What kind of greens.

EMMA: Collard.

ME: What?

EMMA: Collard.

ME: Yeah!

LAUREN: Cabbage?

ME: She got it!  Collards.  Did you say Collards?

EMMA: [Nods yes].

ME: Yeah!!!!  How’d you know?

SAM: She went to Jamaica.

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Empire State- street level
Empire State-view3

My kids’ elementary school recently had a half day of classes, which begged the question: “what to do?”

Usually when I ask my guys for their input, they suggest dinosaurs or The MOMA. But this time Lauren mentioned that she’d like to go to the top of the Empire State Building. Which is fine by me because when it comes to being a tourist in this city, I’m first in line. I’m not above gawking in Times Square and hopping on the red bus tours. Maybe it’s because I’m not from New York, but I’ve always kept a sense of wonder about the city.

This wasn’t our first trip to the Empire State building, but it had been years since our last visit. Plus, it was a beautiful day, making the view that much more promising. With a warning to the kids about long lines and no complaints, we headed up to 36th Street and Fifth Avenue.

When we arrived, I was roped into taking them on the Skyride, a bumpy simulated flight through Manhattan. If you’re easily nauseated, this might not be your finest hour. But my guys loved it and were asking for round 2.

With promises of another visit, and hot chocolates in their future, I was finally able to pry the kids away from the Skyride and head upstairs for the main event: the view.

The Empire State building has two viewing floors – the first is on the 86th floor:

Empire State-view1

Empire State-view2

A friendly tourist offered to take our picture with the city at our feet. Sam picked the perfect opportunity to be shy.

Empire State-family

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